The mind is a powerful thing.....

Follow me on this journey and see if we come to the same conclusion. Keep in mind, all this has happened thus far in my head and no one has been aware.

Monday on my way home with my carpool (aren't I ecofriendly?) a wave of nausea hits me. I pause and then go on. On Tuesday, I feel rotten each time I eat, or don't eat. It depends on the moment. When I get home from work, I lie down with Paul (who is taking a nap at 6 p.m.) and comment that I don't feel very good. Wednesday life goes on as usual and I think nothing of it. Thursday, is a repeat of Tuesday only much, much worse. I feel nauseaus almost all day and I'm unimpressed. It hits most unpleasantly in the middle of a meeting and I toy with having to run out and hope that I don't. Luckily, I make it through the meeting. On my way home, I stop at CVS and make a purchase. I'm almost convinced. Friday, I wake up feeling just fine. I take Emma to school and feel that first wave of sick hit me. Not impressed. I feel that way off and on all day. Needless to say, none of this actually stops me from eating or working. I have a Penn State function on Friday night but at that point I'm darn convinced that the test is going to be positive. I'm already mentally planning and thinking and really excited. All the while, I'm also reminding myself not to get excited. It's late when I get home and we all have to get up early on Saturday. I sneak into the bathroom and pee on a stick (not an impressive or fun thing to do) hoping for confirmation. I wait for what seems like forever. As I'm brushing my teeth I look down only to see the words I dread "not pregnant." Dammit. It was going to be the ultimate in Mother's Day gifts too. I hear my friend's voices in my head telling me that it will happen and not to worry but I'm frustrated.

Perhaps we'll get it right for Father's Day.